Fear of Chaos: Why Pushback Is the Price of Progress
- Kristi Duvall
- Oct 11
- 3 min read
Updated: Oct 15
Understanding the Fear of Chaos in Leadership
Every time I lean into meaningful change, I feel the tension between progress and uncertainty — what I’ve come to call the fear of chaos. It’s that subtle, visceral response that whispers, “What if this breaks everything?” But I’ve learned that pushback isn’t a warning to retreat; it’s a sign that growth is happening. The fear of chaos is not the enemy — it’s the proof you’re moving forward.
When Pushback Shows Up
You’ve probably felt it before: that subtle pullback in a meeting when you introduce a new direction. The crossed arms. The cautious questions. The private side conversations that start with, “But we’ve always done it this way…”
Early in my leadership career, I used to see pushback as a reflection of my credibility. If people hesitated or disagreed, I’d wonder what I did wrong.
But over time, I learned something fundamental about leading through change: pushback is data.
It’s feedback from the system.
It tells you where fear, confusion, or loss of control are hiding.
And that’s gold for any leader willing to see it that way.
What Pushback Really Means
When people resist, they’re rarely fighting you. They’re fighting the unknown.
Change threatens predictability. It rewrites the unspoken rules that make people feel safe:
“Where do I fit in this?”
“Will I still matter?”
“What if I can’t keep up?”
That’s why pushback can sound defensive or emotional — because it’s not about logic. It’s about safety.
When you see resistance as fear instead of defiance, your posture shifts from reactive to responsive.
You stop trying to “win” the moment and start leading through it.
Three Ways to Lead Through Pushback
1. Name It
When tension rises, most leaders speed up.
Try slowing down instead.
Call out what you’re noticing — calmly and without judgment:
“I’m sensing some hesitation here. What concerns are coming up for you?”
Naming the resistance breaks its power. It gives people permission to voice what they’re feeling, which reduces the emotional charge in the room.
2. Normalize It
Remind your team — and yourself — that discomfort is part of the process.
“This feels messy because we’re stretching. That’s what growth looks like.”
Change isn’t linear. The messy middle is where new ways of thinking take root. Your job as a leader is to create safety within the uncertainty, not to remove it altogether.
3. Navigate It
Once you’ve named and normalized the fear, bring everyone back to shared purpose.
Re-anchor in the why:
“Here’s what we’re solving for.”“Here’s what won’t change.”“Here’s how we’ll move forward together.”
Leadership isn’t about knowing every answer — it’s about staying grounded enough to ask the right next question.
The Real Work of Leading Through Change
Here’s the truth: fear of chaos never really goes away.
Even seasoned leaders feel it when they’re breaking new ground.But courage doesn’t mean the absence of fear — it means moving with awareness through it.
When you choose to steady yourself first, you become the anchor others hold onto.
When you stay calm, you make it safe for others to catch their breath.
That’s leadership in its purest form.
If you’re leading through change right now...
Take five minutes to reset. Ask yourself:
What’s really driving the resistance I’m seeing?
How can I create clarity, not control?
What tone do I want to set when uncertainty rises again?
Every answer you find builds your authority from the inside out.
That’s the Spark Within — learning to lead with calm, confidence, and clarity, no matter how strong the storm gets.
💡 Want more on this topic?
This article was featured in The Ember Edit newsletter.
And if you’re navigating turbulence at work or within your team, my free guide can help you rebuild steadiness and trust:
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